Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Weighing myself is like...Russian Roulette

So - I had this uber funny though. I was listening to "Russian Roulette" by Rhianna as I was working out yesterday and thinking about the lyrics (I was doing the Vertical Bench so I had to go to my "happy place" or focus on something else) and I felt....OMG - It so feels the same way as when I'm weighing myself in on those archaic scales (the sliding ones - who uses those these days?) and moving the weights along the scale - begging, pleading that it doesn't pass 130 lbs as it goes by...Check out the lyrics below (I also made some substitutions...)...

Imagine I am walking towards the scales for a weigh-in....

Take a breath, take it deep
Calm yourself, the scale says to me
If you play, you play for keeps
Step on the scale, and count to three
I’m sweating now, moving slow
No time to think, my turn to go

And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must must pass this test
So just step on the scales now....

Say a prayer to yourself
He says close your eyes
Sometimes it helps
And then I get a scary thought
What if I've gained weight, and not lost?

(Chorus)

As my life flashes before my eyes
I’m wondering will I lose weight?
So many pounds still to lose...
But it’s too late, damn, I already ate...

(Chorus)

*LOL* Isn't this funny and sad at the same time?

And I did feel this way as I weighted myself last night and lo behold, I'm back at the 132 lbs I started with. I wanted to kick something (Did I mention I'm PMSing too?)...I kept my dignity in check and walked out of the gym with my head held high.

No more weigh-ins...it is too traumatic....

Of course I'm in shape... Isn't Round a Shape?

I know...I know...I rarely do back-to-back blog entries but this is something I wanted to share so here goes...


Growing up, I hated working out to the core. My PE teachers and classmates could attest to this. Once a week (every week) we had to go for a 2.4km run around the track (which I detested in every shape or form). So what I would do (with my best friend Raudhah) was get changed into our shorts, mark our attendance with the PE teacher, and after that, conveniently go back to the washroom. We would change back into our uniforms and stroll back towards the college (and in the mass of 100+ students we would be mistaken for an earlier group that already did the 2.4km run). The coolest thing would be that since we had nothing to do for the next 1.5 hr, we would head to the McDonald's next door and wave at the runners while digging into our Big Breakfast. Those were the days of great metabolic rates (I was 18 dammit!).


Little did I know was that the Pied Piper was a patient beast and eventually I would have to pony up all the kms I missed out running. As a Hindu, I'm big on karmic retributions, and all those hash browns are coming to bite my big brown booty! It's pay back time!


If only those folks from Temasek Junior College can see me now; huffing and puffing on the treadmill with all my glory, weighting in on the scales with dread (that can only equal that of meeting the Grim Reaper) and turning down another Krispy Kreme donut while my100 lb co-worker chows down 4....they would say, "Alas! It took 12 years and now we will laugh and wave back while snacking on them Big Macs...." *muhahahaha*

I know life isn't fair - but darn it - I'm bringing sexy back (just give me a couple of months though....)!!!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Weight Loss Blues

"You don't realize how strong a person really is until you see them at their weakest moment" - Anonymous

It is not easy to admit - but my weakest moments have been at the gym trying to finish my sets and push through back-breaking workouts and realising that I've not lost any weight. Realising there is NO positive correlation between weight loss and effort on the cardio machines is the pits! I could put in 3-4 hours per week (just in the cardio department!) and it does not guarantee any weight loss but there was always a possibility of weight gain. Bloody hell!

Often, celebrities in the media claim that so-so diet ensured 10 lbs lost a week; or a certain beach workout was a guarantee ab-builder. I find it hard to believe. Me, a regular girl, with a regular life, who was doing her best in the diet and exercise arena was barely seeing any loss in 3 weeks of relentless gym dedication. In fact, the only time I can claim to have lost 2 lbs was when I fell sick (I'd love to take credit for that though).

So things brings me to the next point in my epiphany (and I think I have loads of those as I am blanking out more often due to the lack of food in my system!) - Why is there such an emphasis on body type/shape? Do women just do it to themselves or is it perpetuated by what we see in the media? Or is it a desire to be different from what we are naturally predisposed to (We see it all the time; girls with straight hair want to go curly and vice versa)? Are we simply not enough? For whom? Ourselves?

I will be the first to put up my hand and go - I am my own biggest critic. If I take the moment to step back, and go, "Hey - It's OK if I've not lost the weight I wanted to but I'm making huge healthy changes in my lifestyle...."that should be enough. And you know what they say - when you watch something boil for some reason, it feels like forever? Maybe, just maybe, our bodies work that way too. If we take the pressure of weight loss off, maybe the weight will come off? Who knows...? But it doesn't hurt to give it a try.

Till then, I just write to Santa and tell him I want Beyonce's butt for Christmas....It's IRREPLACEABLE!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

They talk to me you know...

So - What happened the other day when I was trying so hard to be good -

We had a kick-off meeting when one of our key initiatives was launched. And to celebrate during the 2-hour meeting, there was a basket of muffins, scones and donuts. The best part, I was sitting right next to them. I could resist and pretend they were not there for awhile (while various team members were reaching for the goodies and commenting on how delicious they were)...

And then I heard the voices...

"Eat me....come on...I know you wanttttt too...."

I gulped. I could not breathe. I was breaking into a sweat.

I heard more voices...

"Eat us! Eat us! Lather us in raspberry jam...We know you loooveee raspberry jam..."

I bit my lip. Damn....one of these muffins would be the end of the entire 1,200 calorie diet. I had to resist. And I still had 90 minutes of the presentation to go...

Epilogue

I didn't make it.

Alas, I am a woman of flesh; with weaknesses and limitations that include (as you all know) chocolate, bananas, raspberries...I had half a banana chocolate-chunk muffin and it was sooooo good (tasting) but soooo bad! And perhaps I have another problem now too. I don't "see dead people" but I hear treats calling out to me.....

*sigh*

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Bentley has started looking mighty tasty....

So - Day 4 on the new diet and I have to say that 1,2000 calories don't go very far.

The trick to this bloody diet is that you have to make the most of your calories - stretch them on foods that make you full and don't make too much of a ding to your calorie budget. Things like brocolli are great to make you feel full with little calorie impact (But Like Neuman from Seinfeld I say "Vile vegetable!" and need to wash it down with some mustard!)

I remember the first day when I was done my limit after breakfast! That was the end of McDonald's anything for me....it got better over day 2, and 3 of the diet...and now I go over only by a couple hundred of calories per day, but it's not as bad and I am not starving myself.

Two things have occured since I've started my extreme workouts and I've been eating better...

#1 - I initially noticed a dip in my energy levels (especially after the work-outs) but I feel fitter and breathe easier (I'm not huffing and puffing like a big bad wolf anymore!) as the days go by...

#2 - I'm learning to survive on the "better" foods and I actually feel guilty when I don't eat right. I've finally understood the concept of "my body is a temple" and I don't want to feed it with junk. Talk about a shift in mind-set.

And to compliment this transition, I've also started working on my spiritual and psychological needs as well. I've been reading "The Relationship Cure" by D. John M. Gottman which is a step-by-step guide on building better emotional connections with loved ones. I am a firm believer that transformations need to be holistic - and a healthy mind (with healthy connections) is one that can go to the distance when it is under physical stress (new diet and exercise routine). I feel that I can be successful if I embrace all the elements that surround my existence and ensure that they balance each other to make me a happy, healthy individual - well, at least it is a hypothesis I'm testing as a guinea pig! *oink oink*

But alas, I am human, and a woman with intense chocolate cravings. So when they came (and oh, they certainly do!) I go a little cuckoo and compensate for my chocolate needs by eating my baby carrots with gusto that freaks out Bentley. Someone told me to pretend the vegetables and fruit I was eating was like candy ("it's all in your mind..")....and no matter how much of that I eat....I think to myself..."Who am I kidding...? Vile vegetable!"...

"Come over here Bentley....you're looking mighty tasty tonight...you little chocolate dog"

*muhahaha*

Sunday, November 29, 2009

The taste of chocolate....

So Day 1 of the weight loss program -
Protein shake was my liquid lunch as it was 300 calories of wholesome goodness. I blended 2 bananas, soy milk, 1/2 cup of protein, banana flavouring & yogurt after my crazy gym workout. I was so hungry and excited about the prospect of eating something. I drank 2 glasses of the shake and spent a good 10 minutes licking the glass blender - god! I've turned into one of those people on Survivor. I think I could eat a rat if it really came down to it...Talk about Empathy 101!

Also, in preparation for my cold turkey, I've also denied myself pop (Pepsi, Coke, etc) and chocolates in the past month or so. Today I was making one of my legendary brownies for one of my good friend's birthday - the "awesome" Toblerone brownies. As I grated the toblerone bars for the batter, one fell and I thoughtlessly picked it up and put it in my mouth. Now I know what the addicts must feel like when they come in contact with drugs (or vampires who swear off blood but get a slight taste of it). I think I went slightly loca...I needed to pull myself together.

They need something akin to Alcoholics Anonymous for the rest of us trying to diet...damn you under-30 people with great metabolic rates. I hate all of you. Just kidding - I don't.

Yes, I do.... :P

Weight on my Mind...

I know – it’s been ages since my last blog post. Other than being busy, there was no “major” event in my life that I wanted to keep everyone abreast of. The last one was my sister’s wedding. I finally found something I bet many people can relate too (or may have the same “struggle” with) – WEIGHT.

I turned 30 this year and the 30th year + 1 day I was alive – something weird happened. The 3 birthday cakes I had enjoyed the day before woke up next to me (I am used to waking up alone!). I was warned for the entire year leading up to my 30th that this was going to happen. The weight just sticks to you. But hey, this is me we’re talking about and I live in denial. So I kept thinking that it was a phase my body was going through (kinda like water retention once a month) but something was different – I could not pin-point what exactly had changed.

I had my Wellness Assessment at my gym two weeks ago and I heard what I have not heard in all my 30 years of being alive. “Dear, you are 6% overweight. You need to lose 11 lbs to bring your weight to your ideal body weight for your height and age”. I could not believe it. How could it be? I eat right – A vegetarian who doesn’t indulge in junk food, no fast food, and better yet, doesn’t smoke or drink. How could I be 11lbs overweight? (That’s 5 kilograms for those of you who believe in the metric system).

Still in denial when I came back – I came to Facebook to look for comfort in the arms of my family and friends. I could not help looking through the “history” of my FB status updates for the last couple of months and could not believe what I saw!

“I had Rasmalai for breakfast – yum”....
“3 birthday cakes? That’s it?”....
“I made a huge tray of almond-pistachio biscotti & coconut-pecan banana bread today!”
“Mango vs. Pistachio kulfi – Which do I heart more?”
“Time to wear the elastic pants – Dinner at Shabusan tonight”..
“Can’t fit into my work clothes...hopefully one day work pants can be optional and we can wear sweats (and/or jammies) to work”...

It was all staring at me in the face...the clothes that don’t fit, my affinity to elastic everything, my fridge filled with more desserts than vegetables, me panting to catch the train (or Bentley), or the best one, me eyeing the old lady sitting in the sky train wondering if she or I deserved the seat more (as I could not stand for the 4 stops from Commercial Drive to Brentwood)! I was living an unhealthy lifestyle and kidding myself that being vegetarian trumped all! Dude!
So the next series of blog posts will be dedicated to my efforts in losing the 11 lbs over the next 50 days (wish me luck!). I’m on a friggin’ crazy workout administered by one of the trainers at my gym and my good friend Sarb will help me with the diet choices.

I’ll end this post as a tribute to all the foods that I used to love to devour (and think about all the time pre-devouring) and bid them farewell in an attempt to get closure on the previous unhealthy chapter of my life and as Sarb cleverly puts “Be prepared to eat for nutrition and not for taste”.

I bid thee farewell:
• Yam Fries lathered in chipotle mayo from White Spot
• Awake Tea Mistos from Starbucks (with 6 pumps of Vanilla syrup)
• Chocolate Lover’s Cake from Safeway
• Yan-Yan (*sob* A whopping 320 calories per box)
• Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes and my friend, buddy, confidant, Tony the Tiger
• Polar Bear Sugar Cookies and Mint-Chocolate Chip Brownies from Starbucks
• Croissants (this is sooo very hard...the little baby cute ones have 45 calories each)..
• Kaju Barfi/Kulfi/Jelabi/Milk Cake....
• Poutine from KFC
• Onion Rings from Burger King
• Tomato Basil Soup from Safeway
• Yam Rolls & any other sushi with cream cheese
• Actually...strike anything with cream and/or cheese...

I think I need a good cry in my bathroom....

Saturday, August 1, 2009

It wasn't me...

Travelling with my mom is an experience within itself. I love my mother dearly and have in the recent years realised that I want to spend as much time with her and my family as I possibly can. But that’s as sentimental as I’m going to get in this blog entry. This one is dedicated purely to one of the funniest things that happened on the trip.


So, at the end of our journey as we boarded the plane and were seated, the air stewardess came up to both of us and greeted us personally with a piece of paper in her hand. This is not uncommon since my mom and I are notorious for pre-ordering our Asian Vegetarian Meals and we get a re-confirmation from the flight crew prior to take-off. I totally expected a visit from the staff.


What I did NOT expect was the air stewardess said –


She read from the piece of paper in her hands and looked at the both of us with deep compassion in her eyes. She did not speak English well so we had no clue if she was referring to my mom (Mrs Nanwani) or me (Ms Nanwani) but this is what she said:
“...Nanwani...if there is anything I can do to help or assist you in your condition, please let me know. I am always here for you...”


What condition was she talking about? She seemed like a doctor who had taken a look at my latest test results and was putting on a brave face to tell me the bad news.


And she was talking SO slowly, pronouncing each and every word – Other passengers might have thought we had learning disabilities!


So we smiled and said “Thank you” to her. What else could we say?


And then mom and I turned to each other and went “She was talking about YOU, wasn’t she?”


Then my mother turned to me and said – “Shall I ask her for an upgrade to first class?”


Talk about taking full advantage of the situation. I AGREED!


I thought about asking her to bring an unopened bottle of Johnnie Walker’s Blue Label to help me wash down my pack of nuts.


The possibilities were endless.


But unfortunately, the lady did not return to take our special requests. It was a short flight back to Singapore anyways – but I guess it will always remain a mystery as to what information she had (or she thoughts she had) regarding us – but I will stick to my guns that the stewardess meant “Mrs Nanwani” (no matter what my mother thinks!).


Ha ha...

Hong Kong Adventures

Confusion, Crowds, Chaos

Those are the three things that characterized my very first impression of Hong Kong.

Regardless, I was determined to immerse myself in what it feels like to be part of Hong Kong!

My entry into Hong Kong International Airport (affectionately known as HKIA) brought on a lot of confusion. If I landed on one terminal, why am I going to the next terminal to check in to immigration and pick up my bags? It then occurred to me – HKIA is massive! Fact: HKIA operates one of the world's largest passenger terminal buildings and operates twenty-four hours a day. In 2008, Hong Kong International Airport was the second busiest airport in the world in terms of cargo traffic, handling 3,656,724 tons of cargo. It was also the 12th busiest airport worldwide in terms of passenger throughput. Wow! To handle such huge capacity, it had to be massive!

And speaking of confusion – I believe it anyone can successfully navigate Kong Kong’s MTR system – they are more likely a whiz rocket scientist! MTR, or Mass Transit Railway, is the rapid transit railway system in Hong Kong. The network includes 211.6 km of rail with 150 stations, including 83 railway stations and 68 light rail stops. Holy cow! The MTR system is a common mode of public transport in Hong Kong, with over 4 million trips made in an average weekday.

Here is an interesting tidbit about the MTR - Unlike many other metro systems around the world MTR stations do not have toilet facilities available for public use, although their installation has been contemplated. The folks running the line said it would not consider retrofitting existing underground toilets because of the challenge of installing new piping and toilet facilities. Jesus Christ! If you can build an under and over ground complicated transit railway system that serves 150 stations – I’m sure you can come up with a way to install a porta-potty in each station! As you can probably tell, I have been screwed over when I’ve travelled long distances on the MTR with a Venti Starbucks Tea Misto! :P

But I digress!

This brings me to my next point about Hong Kong – the crowds! You know, when you have a day off from work or a vacation day and you can easily go to Superstore or stroll along HWY 1 with little to no traffic? This is NOT the case with Hong Kong. There is no such thing as an “off-peak” time. EVERYTIME is a “peak time”. A small tidbit of information - With a population of 7 million people but land area of 1,108 km2 (428 sq mi), Hong Kong is one of the most densely populated areas in the world. So there are people coming out of the wood works (or more ethnically appropriately) out of the ying yang ALL THE TIME!

And this results in chaos. But, I believe having been to Hong Kong, there is such a thing as good and bad chaos. Bad chaos is what I was traditionally accustomed to when I visited the key night markets in Hong Kong: Ladies’ Market, Temple Street Night Market and Jade Night Market. Note, most of these are night markets which is not surprising since Hong Kong well-known for being a city that does not sleep.

Good chaos, in my mind, is an interesting harmony of sorts. You know, when you visit cities and there is one or two things special about them that you always cherish? With BC it’s the Nature; Australia’s Great Barrier Reef; China’s Great Wall? With Hong Kong, it has everything. In one of my pictures taken from the cable car ride to Lantau Island – I saw vast mountains covered with natural forests cuddled by huge bodies of water. And encapsulated in its midst – the city! Skyscrapers galore! Hong Kong, in its humility, has everything to offer! Jeez – I swear this is not a plug for the Hong Kong Tourism Board – honest!

I came away from the travel experience with three things I will remember the most about Hong Kong:

Cosmopolitan, Charismatic, Crazy

Except when you need to use the bathroom urgently while on the MTR!

I heart Hong Kong!